This is my brain on drugs.

If I were on drugs, I'd look like this on a continuing basis. Just because it's funny. 
(This hilarity is brought to you from my daughter, who, ironically, was not on drugs. She's just strange.)

Anyway... 

Having this obnoxious cold thingy makes me think about the brain (of course!) and how we perceive the world around us. So many things influence the brain and how it can cognitively function. Though I've always been interested in this process, I've never been so aware of it in myself until I started writing on a daily basis.

Simple things, small things, affect how well I connect to my story:

• Not enough sleep      <------ Check out the studies that back me up!
• Forgetting to exercise
• Drinking too much coffee
• Not drinking enough water
• Having a drink the night before
• Taking cold or allergy medications

Just one of these alone can mess with how quickly my brain reacts to the world of Pendomus... Can you imagine when multiples are at play?

Sometimes I wonder if this idea of writers block really boils down to something this simple:

I'm not at my best today. 


So then I ask myself: Which areas of my life do I need to concentrate on in order to regain balance? I'll take a closer look at my week, for example, to see where I've been out of sync. Typically, it's because I've become neurotically obsessed and have forgotten to do something simple, like feed myself.


I've been sick on and off for the past month-- which has become increasingly annoying. (Thank you small children in school and seasonal allergies!) There have been a couple times when I've finally given in and taken cold medicine. Every time, I feel like being up and dressed is about the best I can manage and it's not a good way for me to meet my goddamn deadline. Not to mention, slacking off is not something I enjoy. I'm a doer and I don't feel right (on whole) when I'm not DOING. 


However, I know there are times when that's exactly what I need. A complete and total lack of doing. Why? Balance. Generally speaking, life is about this often elusive balance thing. Finding that awesome blend between work and play. Between enough and excess... 


When I go overboard in one direction or another, it's like my subconscious way of bringing me back around. A problem manifests physically (like low immunity) or outwardly (like a crazy ass disaster of a house) and at some point you reach a precipice and need to either back off or drop over the edge. 


Do any of you ever feel this way? Wonder how your actions in the moment, hell even the night before, are affecting your day today? Am I the only strange one to watch for these patterns and notice the difference? 


Though I've struggled with this lack of doing for the past weekend, it was the best thing I could've done. Sometimes, when you just let go -- that's when you find what you're really seeking. Out of nowhere a new pattern emerged and I saw a new ending to my story - one that's so perfect, I don't know how I missed it before. Probably because all it boils down to is sequence. I had all the pieces, they were just in the wrong order!

Now, I'm in the process of correcting that and I think, in the end, it will make for a better book.

Plus, I'm off the DayQuil, on the writing sprint toward the finish line and come Hell or High Water, I will reach that goddamn deadllne. ;)