Refreshing...

I know, I know… it's been a while. Again. LOL!

Well, these things happen.

On the upside, I've been getting a lot done. Hell, a lot more than I was before I started working full time. Which is, in itself, sorta weird.

Last time I wrote, I was having trouble with it. Trouble getting my grove on whilst working.

While I am still hit or miss on writing in book two, come the ass-crack o'clock, I am making headway with final edits from my betas for book one. I'm 1/3 of the way through with it, as a matter of fact. But the biggest thing coming out of this final pass is this:

I am regaining my sense of excitement for the book, the world and my characters. 

I have a clear direction to what I need to fix for book one so I can move on to the crazy writing of book two. Book two even has it's skeletal outline ready to go. (Be watchful of a blog post on that coming up. Pantsing it, versus Plotting it.)

Within this realm of revitalization and reintegration of Pendomus into my daily life… I've decided that my hub- this blog- needed its own refreshing. So, you may notice some changes that have taken place. A new look and feel - but still carrying forward similar colors, as they tie in to Pendomus so well.

I hope this update makes things easier to use. Easier to find. Easier to read.

I can't promise to blog as often as I should, but I will try to do it as often as I can.

Refocus

After last week's crazy vanity escapades, a few new things have come to light…

First: My Mom ended up having emergency surgery this weekend on her right eye. Turns out, her retina detached and if she didn't get it fixed as soon as possible, it would lead to permanent blindness. As I've stated before, she's a visual artist (with her specialty in acrylic painting) and the whole thing has been frightening. So far, the surgery sounds like it was a success, though her eye needs to be monitored for the next few weeks. It could, however, take up to 6 months for her vision to be completely normal. We're all hoping for a speedy and successful recovery for her. Love you, Mom!

Second: While I didn't like the way the subject of my networking usage was broached last week, I've done a lot of thinking and feel it's time to regroup. My Goddamn Deadline is looming just a few weeks away and I'm only entering Chapter 21 (of 32). The ending of Pendomus still has to be reworked (which, to be honest, I am looking forward to) and it needs to be top priority.

Third: There's only a month and a half to pull myself together before heading to Georgia for the Moonlight and Magnolias Conference. (Hey, CRITS gals!) And that alone is enough to send me into a tail spin.

So, with all this in mind, if you don't see me on Twitter or blogging much for the next 6 weeks… Assume this is why. I will be back. Yes, I may even continue the Embarrass Me[me]'s. LOL!

But for now...

The universe has sent a clear message: Time to refocus.

I'm so vain...

I probably think this post is about me…

This has been a stellar week…

It's all about me

Backstory: I was blindsided by family members accusing me of spending too much time on the internet since launching my author platform. They think I've become a complete narcissist, caring only about what "people I don't know" think.

Logically, I know this is not the case… I did my research on author platforms (I like how Steve Umstead explains it---> here.), and in all honesty, I don't care about twitter numbers or blog followers. If you like me, fantastic. If you don't, no harm done. I don't even have a blog schedule for crying out loud. (I just post when something comes to mind).

BUT, I will be the first to admit it, I enjoy people. I enjoy connecting to all of you. I'm the extrovert in a family of introverts… Does it really make me vain?


In my family, we actually have people who are affected by narcissistic personality disorder. So to be slapped with this kind of label is more than upsetting. It means something. It's the highest form of insult.


I can usually let stuff roll off me… take what I need, let go of the rest. I bounce back.

This has not been one of those weeks.

I try very hard to keep balance. Evidently, I'm not balanced enough for their liking. Their reasoning? I can't go more than an hour without having to check Twitter. I can multitask by making supper, cleaning, changing diapers and twittering all at the same time. (In fact, I live for the challenge of it.)

Everyone has good and bad days with balance, I suppose. I know I'm no different. But my kids are fed. They are clothed and we do fun things. My house isn't in complete shambles (dust bunnies may be running amok, shhh…).

None of them understand Twitter or blogging. (It's just to stroke my own ego, right?) Hell, I didn't understand them until this past February. So I get it. Doesn't mean their words hurt any less.

Twitter, in specific, has been an eye opening and lovely surprise. I've met amazing people and you (yes, you) make my day rich because of it. Yes, it's true--->I can honestly say I look forward to chatting with my fellow miscreants. It's like the water cooler for the virtual job on my computer screen and in my head.

In my "real life" jobs… I work with family members or I work alone. As I said earlier, I'm the ONLY extrovert of the family. Dealing with just family members every day doesn't cut it for me. THAT is when I start to go insane. Additionally, in their eyes because my job as a writer isn't paid, it doesn't matter as much, I guess. I shouldn't take it as seriously, or something. Even though it is what I love to do.

*scratches head*

I'm sorta befuddled.

What are your thoughts? Does interacting on Twitter and writing a blog (with stories about ME) make me a complete narcissist? Am I insane for thinking I was heading in the right direction?

Obnoxious Barenaked Ladies and Fancy Virgo Signs

As usual, the inspirational Lyn Midnight of Lyn Midnight Against the Odds has prodded me to blog.

It started as: "Hey, what's the best key word/phrase-a-ma-doodad people have used to find your blog?"

When I told her mine were lame, she didn't believe me.

Seriously, the best one I got is naked ladies and that's saying' something. *raises a sardonic eyebrow*

So, since they suck so bad they could turn into a super massive black hole, I've decided to try a different spin on her idea... Mwah!

Take a gander at the list-o-suckage: (Well, minus Joss Whedon... since he's freakin' awesome.)

joss whedon

obnoxious

barenaked ladies

fancy virgo signs

barenaked ladies cover

get to the finish line

naked ladies

inner stillness bestowal

josh whedon

loud wine label

quit before the finish line

want to know your soul

As you can see... I either need to become more risqué on my blog or something... 'cause these are BORING! HA!

So, it is in the frame of being creative with this lame-o words, that I am going to attempt to put them all together to make one kick ass paragraph. Though, I reserve the right to... um... tell you to ignore it all together and mind wipe you if I fail. Sound good?

Mmmmkay. Let's get started. :D

I was as obnoxious as I've ever been... but let's be honest, I don't want to know your soul. It's like a loud wine label, screaming for inner stillness bestowal, for godsake. Besides, I had to get to the finish line. I knew Joss Whedon was going to sing a Barenaked Ladies Cover and I had fancy virgo signs to get his attention. What? Don't judge. I could't scrounge up any real naked ladies. Not on this short notice. But that got blown out of the water. Next thing I knew, Ed from the real Barenaked Ladies caught wind of the event. He didn't like Dollhouse, so only some dude named Josh Whedon was allowed on stage. I didn't know what kind of fuckery this was, but I didn't like it. I mean, who names their kid Josh when it could be Joss? Nope, couldn't be trusted. Though I told myself I wouldn't do it, I quit before the finish line. TrueBlood was on anyway and that Alexander Skarsgård is hot. 

Vampirey barenaked goodness. Though, not at all a lady. 

Temporarily Vacated

This is just a quick reminder that I'll be lurking over at TS Welti's blog.

Come on over to check out her interview and say HI!

It goes live around 10am Pacific time! :D

Feel free to go over there and ask me questions about Pendomus.

I'll answer! (As best I can!) 

Generation Gap

Hey all you bloggery-reader-folken! 

*waves*

I was poked by Lyn Midnight yesterday (come to think of it, she did it again today) to get my ass in gear and write another blog. It's been... like... a week. Or something. *gasp*

LOL!

People who follow my blog already know I'm random. I blog when the fancy hits me. I don't have a schedule I adhere to. (Mostly, so no flogging occurs). Plus, I don't want to be boring.

But a random thought did occur to me today.

Well, okay. Maybe not so much random as it's been bugging me for days and I finally want to discuss it. ;)

Not so random thought ----> GENERATION GAPS

My Mom and I weren't seeing eye to eye for the past month. No worries. Things have been straightened out. Words exchanged. Hugs given. It's all good now. (I hope!)

Here's the thing; I love her dearly and I could not live the life I do without her amazing help. She watches my kids three days a week so I have time to work on web banner ads (for my other life... I mean, job) and so I can write.

BUT

Care for some quiche?

She and I have a different perception of what it means to be a mom.

Sometimes, I think her view is something more akin to ---------> 


Which I know is ridiculous. I grew up with her. She's an artist with a myriad of paintings under her belt. She's accomplished in her own right. And to be honest, between you and me... she doesn't cook. ;)*

(Gods, she gonna kill me... LOL!)

What the hell do you wanna eat?

<---------------My idea of being a parent is more akin to...

I like my space. I like my kids to have independence. They have their own interests, as I have mine. Sometimes they collide and that's freakin' awesome. I'm not gonna hover. But I'm not gonna let them blow up the house, either.
(Thanks, MythBusters!)

While they are clearly a substantial aspect in my life, I don't define myself as only a mom. Of course, my kids are important. OF COURSE I would do anything within my grasp to help them.

But one thing I will NOT do, is give up my sense of self for them.

Carl Jung once stated:

“Nothing effects children any more than the unlived lives of their parents.”

And I couldn't agree more. Kids learn my imitation. They watch how the adults in their lives handle their lives. I want my kids to know they can BE ANYTHING, DO ANYTHING that they choose. Sometimes that means work. Sometimes, it means sacrifice. Sometimes, it even means setting aside the laptop and running through the sprinkler with them. It's all about balance.

How do you open the world up for them like that? Leading by example. 

Which is why I'm so diligent. Why I bust my ass on everything I do. Transformation happens in the day to day activities. It is NOT a future event. I'm acutely aware of that in every single moment. 

In our conversation, though, my Mom brought up the A word. No, not that one... "aspiring". She still thinks I'm aspiring to be an author. That I need to treat it as such. Right now, my push is and has been Pendomus. I won't lie. But I still workout. I still bring my son to T-ball. My daughter still gets to play at the park. We still eat. 

However, I'm no longer aspiring. I've written a damn book. 

I'm a firm believer that we shape our reality. We mold our possibilities. If I allowed myself to slip into the mindset of "aspiring author", I'm no longer in the role. I'm in the role of "aspiring". See the difference?

Which is why I've said it once and I'll say it again-----> I am an author. 

What do my kids want to be? As far as I'm concerned, the sky is the limits. And I plan on being their example.

*ADDENDUM- My mother is, however, excellent at making lasagna. It's dripping with cheese to the point of lacking form. But it IS delicious. ;)